Wednesday, December 4, 2013
A Dating Relationship at Work
Professional career minded employees do not date their co-workers in small offices, or small companies. Most small businesses are privately owned and located in small towns to large cities. So the location and numbers of employees varies depending also on what type of company.
In large businesses with many floors one might speculate the risk is better. And what do I mean by risk---exactly that---one faces many perils in dating a co-worker in a small business environment. So, given more space between their workplace areas on different floors is better for both.
Never date your Boss; this is a big taboo---it is like jumping off a career cliff---one might land in the unemployment line. And, this means in a small or large business in small town or big city---it is a bad idea.
This is your decision of course and I am not one who will stand in the way of true love, however, I can share with you my knowledge and experience of what happens in small and large companies on this subject.
We will for the sake of anonymity name this person Helen. Helen’s resume’ showed her as a very skilled legal secretary and she spoke four languages. A head hunter hired Helen from another firm to work in a larger one. Her immediate Boss and his wife had separated, which was something Helen did not know and did not seem to want to know anything personal about anyone in the legal corporation.
Being new some of the women invited her out after work for a drink to find out as much about her as possible. They were not labeled as the office gossips; but it never hurt to know your competition in business. Especially, since she was working for a very handsome attorney who was a full partner in the firm.
Helen was a very attractive career minded person and was one who never gossiped or share much about herself. Then as the weeks flew by Helen was working late with her Boss almost every night. Well, if that was not enough for the office gossip, Helen accepted a few dates on several weekends with an attorney from her old firm.
We will call him Jake, and to prove the truth is more twisted sometimes than fiction. Jake was good friends with Helen’s Boss’ wife---they grew up in the same neighborhood. Well, we know how people talk sometimes who wants to brag a little. It seems he was bragging to Helen’s Boss’ wife about her husband’s beautiful legal secretary---however, he did not add he was dating Helen.
Long story short---Helen’s Boss and his wife went back together and his wife insisted that her husband get another secretary. So Helen was temporarily out of a job, but she obtained a good reference from her Boss who let his wife dictate to him about whom should work for him.
So, all of Helen’s dedication at the firm did not matter now, because her Boss terminated her and it was not her fault. She had worked less than 90 days. Helen got to the bottom of what happened and obtained her own attorney and sued for everything she lost in her future benefits and stock options, since she signed a contract for a year. This taught her a lesson in savvy dating even in the same field as one’s Boss, because the results proved the same as dating in a small office.
I share this with all the career women who might not stop and survey the lay of the land---this is very important to know where you stand and to look ahead for any issues. Make sure you protect yourself as well as your career when dealing with small and larger businesses. And, never gossip with anyone---walk a straight line to secure the least amount of work related issues.
If one is contemplating dating a co-worker first make sure it is not against the company rules. Check the “Employee’s Handbook” and then check with Human-Resources. Dating at work is a big issue one needs to to really think about all the positives and negatives before making the decision. After doing your due-diligence and feeling comfortable about it---I wish you the very best.
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